Don't allow hate in my heart
My mantra for living in America these days
When choosing a Word of the Year, I’ve been warned that whatever feeling is selected as the goal will only be achieved through practice. That practice can only take place when experiencing challenging circumstances that test our commitment to the vision of our Word. This year, I chose the word Elevate and almost immediately, I’ve been pulled down into the mire and forced to face fears that challenge my ability to keep my peace.
I wrote about my Word of the Year journaling practice - outlining the prompts I use and the results of this year’s practice - in two recent posts:
Choosing the word Elevate developed out of a journal prompt inviting me to write about my ideal daily life and I quickly realized - I’m living it! I have a caring partner, an adorable dog, and a cozy home - those three things were what I dreamt about when I was in my 20s. Now in my 40s, I care less about what other people think of me and I spend time doing what I enjoy. I have good friends, a close-knit family, and a satisfying job; I could not ask for more.
In my Word of the Year journaling practice, I wrote about my desires for this next year and it boiled down to wanting to keep living my abundant life with gratitude, finding joy in all things, and finding balance in my days through deep rest alongside hard work for the passion projects as I’ve been, all while continuing to keep contentment a daily focus.
Proud of the strides I’ve made in my mental and spiritual health over the last few years, I owe it to my daily spiritual practices of writing, gratitude, and meditation. I started the year strong, elevating those practices.
My gratitude practice has evolved over the years and I’ve maintained a daily ritual of naming 3 things I’m grateful for every day before letting my feet hit the floor. It helps me remain content as I start my day. As a way of elevating this practice, I purchased a large monthly calendar and at the end of each day, I’ve been writing out my gratitude before bed to see it visually.
I hit a 14-day streak on Insight Timer, the app I use for my daily meditation, before catching a 30-hour stomach bug and missing a few days. I’m back on track again now as Consistency was my word of 2023. That year, I learned that consistency is not about never stopping, it’s about showing back up and returning to the goal every time life gets in the way.
I am continually amazed at the power of having a daily spiritual practice. Do you have a daily spiritual practice?
While simple, it's grounding and it keeps me focused on the things that matter. These sustained practices of writing, meditation, and gratitude have helped me rise above the everyday drama of life, for the most part.
I’ve learned to take deep breaths when my mind starts to wander or my body gets tense. It's become an automatic response. Using the power of interoception, I’ve been able to notice when my brain triggers my stress response and I’ve learned how to turn it off. (Much thanks for Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle for that!)
And then this week, less than a month after choosing my word - Elevate - Trump was sworn in as President and I feel my peace of mind is being tested.
Being Tested
Throughout the election, my plea during meditation was: Don’t allow hate in my heart. Don’t allow hate in my heart. Don’t allow hate in my heart.
It remains my wish.
It's easier to give in and find fault and talk shit. (And believe me, I still do that too at times) But I tried to remain positive throughout the election and recognize much of the political talk was a distraction from my purpose in life - to love, to share, to build connections. This is why I think we're all here and it's being tested right now.
Throughout the election, it was hard hearing his plans for dismantling regulations that keep us safe or wrecking more havoc on our planet or removing people’s rights and still keep my faith. I didn’t understand how someone so deceitful, who is focused only on himself and making money, could attract such a following. And from friends of mine! It's madness - it's disheartening. It makes me question the people I love.
Listening to the Trump campaign’s disdain for people I care about and sowing division, my husband’s favorite line repeats in my mind:
“Choose faith or fear because you can’t have both.”
I wish to elevate my mind above the day-to-day drama of it all, but I am full of fear right now. When watching the news, it’s hard not to think about the individual people who will be harmed by the new policies being enacted. I am scared of the impact of this new republican party’s agenda on our country’s future and I'm terrified of the hateful people who are being emboldened by it. Don’t allow hate in my heart.
Watching the news over the past week has become a real test of my vision of what living in an elevated state looks like. After a few minutes of hearing updates from the day, my heart rate picks up and I feel agitated, then sorrowful, then pissed. Don’t allow hate in my heart.
I want to have faith and believe everything will work out, that the onslaught of Executive Orders won’t cause damage, and that the picks for the highest positions in our country will not backfire. It’s hard to believe it though, as an empathetic person and as someone who works in education. It’s hard to imagine this path leads anywhere good. Don’t allow hate in my heart.
We must be the change we wish to see in the world.
This quote attributed to Gandhi is tattooed on my foot, to guide my steps and lead me in the right direction. When I’m unsure what way that is - I consider these quotes:
When unsure where to go, go inward.
When the world feels scary, we must ask ourselves: How can I serve?
When the world feels dark, our only job is to be the light.
Going inward often leads me to yoga philosophy. The Bhagavad Gita reminds us that it is more important for us to live our own life, even if imperfectly than to try to live someone else’s life perfectly.
Over the last 10 years, I discovered, I’m not a political activist. I used to be afraid that not being an activist meant I was apathetic and a shitty person, unwilling to fight for what was right. I feared people would not see me as a supportive ally if I wasn't out protesting and demanding change. Though I’ve advocated my beliefs to others and spoken up in 1:1 settings, I used to fear it wouldn’t be seen as enough. While I’ve donated to causes I believe in quite a bit, I’ve only attended one protest in the last few years. The way I’ve been educating myself and trying to educate others is not done on a public stage.
As someone who battled their inner critic mostly around being seen by others as worthy, I’ve struggled with not being seen as good enough in this regard. But the truth is, I’ve come to realize, I’m just not an activist. Not because I don’t care, but because it’s not what I’m called to do. It’s not my path.
What I can do to help others doesn’t need to be public to be valuable.
I have friends who are activists and they are energized around this work. They have campaigned and marched and protested publicly. My spirit is with them in those endeavors as I believe in their work, but yoga philosophy says we must follow our own path. I’m not an activist but I can still support what I think is right in other ways.
We’re not all built for the same work ~ we must learn to do what we're meant to do to create change.
How can I serve?
I can build community. I can create spaces for healing. I can offer free accessible Write to Heal community circles online so the activists and others can reflect and re-energize for the long road ahead. I can put my attention on supporting people in my community, being vulnerable and open, and offering support in any way I can.
How can I be the light?
I can rise above the hate and keep my head lifted, my smile wide, and my heart light and free. I can show others love, empathy, and compassion. I can live my life with gratitude and joy. I can role model the way I wish our politicians, and all people, would treat each other. I can show respect to all, even and especially to those who are fighting against what I believe is right. I can offer my listening ear, my shoulder, and my open heart to the world.
How can I be the change I wish to see in the world?
I can interrupt ignorance when I hear it. I can call in those who might not understand the impact of their words or actions. I can continue to educate myself and share what I learn with others. I can lead with love in all my interactions. I can resist what I don’t believe in peacefully with sincerity and grace. I can not allow hate into my heart.
I can also stop reading and watching the news as often, avoid the rabbit hole of social media, and detox from my phone. That might be the biggest test!
These are my goals for how I can Elevate my practices this year. It’s going to be a very difficult year! But I chose the word and therefore, I will be tested on it.
Journal Prompts:
If you have a word of the year practice, how have you been tested already this year? How can you respond to those tests? What are some of your daily spiritual practices you can turn to when needed?
The Bhagavad Gita reminds us that it is more important for us to live our own life, even if imperfectly than to try to live someone else’s life perfectly. What does this mean to you? How are you living, or how are you not living, your own life?
When the world feels dark, how can you serve? How can you be the light? How can you be the change you wish to see in the world?
Join me for my next FREE Workshop - Write to Heal Community Circle - on Tuesday, January 28 from 745pm-830pm EST. We'll begin with some deep breaths and body awareness, then spend 5 minutes each on 5 prompts all focused on self-discovery. We’ll end with a community share circle. No writing experience is necessary!
These circles will be offered on the last Tuesday of the month through 2025.
Interested in a Write to Heal Retreat at a book-themed hotel? This retreat will take place on Saturday, March 29 at a boutique 7-bedroom hotel in West Chester, PA. We’ll combine writing with accessible yoga practices like meditation and yin yoga and of course, we’ll leave plenty of time for reading or writing on the plush couches or in your room, each inspired by a famous book and each bed framed by bookshelves. We’ll write with a variety of prompts including a nature walk on the beautiful grounds of this book-lovers paradise!
Only 5 rooms remain - book your spot today!
Fragile Thoughts: A Healing Memoir is available anywhere books are sold. My book was published in 2023 by New Degree Press and now the audiobook is live!
If you have Spotify Premium, it’s included - and if not, it is on sale now for $9.99!
Thank you for reading Write to Heal. Please hit that heart button❤️if you made it this far and join me in the comments or chat to share your thoughts. I’m eager to hear about your daily spiritual practices and how you’re managing the political world these days. And I’d love to hear strategies for how to put that phone/social media down!
Thank you Tricia - so helpful to hear I'm not alone. I haven't read a course in miracles but always hear about it, it might be time to read it!
"I am continually amazed at the power of having a daily spiritual practice. Do you have a daily spiritual practice?"
Yoga, meditation, sound bathing, and being present with nature. Also, prayer.