Staying Calm Amid the Chaos
It only took me 17 years to figure out how
The last few weeks have been a blur. The start of the academic year is always this way. As I balance the multiple offerings I run for students on campus as the new semester begins, I’m in awe at the lessons learned this time around.
Over the past four weeks, I’ve facilitated 28 educational training sessions for students. On multiple occasions, I’ve hosted hour-long sessions back-to-back with just 15 minutes between them. This is typical but for the first time in my 17 academic years working in higher education, I have finally figured out to remain calm amid the chaos.
The Life of a Health Promotion Director
In welcoming new students to campus, I host two sessions. One training is for all students, 400+ first-years, called Building Your Well-being Toolkit which reviews the six dimensions of wellness and how to take care of ourselves in each arena.
It’s not easy standing on a stage in front of hundreds of 18-year-olds, bright lights on me as many stare into the lights on their phone, distracted and disengaged. I have to keep it interesting, with high energy and strong content. Often I need incentives. I am not beyond throwing t-shirts into the crowd like I was at a basketball game! While wellness is a passion of mine, and I know just how valuable the content is, I still left that session feeling completely drained.
Two days later, still during their Orientation program, the students are broken into smaller groups so I have about 140 students at a time for Bear Expectations: Bystander Intervention. In this session, we talk about the values of our community and review the bystander intervention model using scenarios. I conduct that 45-minute session 3 times in a row at 9am, 10am, and 11am on a Saturday morning. By noon, I was exhausted.
Before Orientation even begins, I’m also organizing and running training for our student leaders including Resident Assistants (RAs) and Orientation Leaders called My Role in Health Promotion. They need to understand campus trends and resources while also building skills to have tough conversations as role models among their peers. These sessions are typically 1.5-2 hours each, and while the students are invested and engaged, I was worn out by the end of them.
But after each of the sessions, with leaders or new students, I didn’t trudge home, shoulders slumped, complaining as I have in the past. I remain motivated and hopeful. Even as my energy drains, I’ve been finding ways to refuel.
As the leaves fall, so do I.
Usually, at 3 weeks into the academic year, I’m a frazzled, crying heap of a human. I fall back into the routine of dreading the work day and dragging my feet.
For 16 years, at this point in the yearly cycle, I have been disengaged from my family and friends, frustrated, and complaining constantly. Battling my brain back and forth, “Should I stay or should I go?” as I start my annual job search for a new gig outside of higher education, dreaming of greener pastures.
While I’ve always loved the work I do, working in higher education has gotten harder and I’ve become more cynical and apathetic with each passing year. The summer is less stressful so as the year begins anew, I prepare for the strain on my body and mind with the long days and extra work on nights and weekends.
While all those circumstances remain true, I’ve found that I am not even close to being as stressed as I usually am at this time of year.
It’s simple - but not easy. As I said, it’s taken me 17 years to figure it out but I finally realized I can change my mindset and it magically changes the way the world feels around me.
I’m learning from the trees what a beautiful release it can be to let go of things that no longer serve you.
I am renewed and seeing my work as my life’s mission and so it’s showing up in a whole new light. I’m reminded that I am living the life I used to dream about as me and my therapist, back in 2019, manifested this job! (That’s another story for another day).
says beautifully in Eat, Pray, Love: If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That's the only thing you should be trying to control. And I finally got it!Instead of complaining, I find myself saying things like:
“It’s only a few busy weeks. It won’t be like this forever.” ~ perspective-shifting reframes I learned from therapy
“I can only control what I can control.” ~ the lesson of letting go I discovered through yoga philosophy
“I’m grateful to have a job that I enjoy and am good at with great flexibility that’s also so close to home.” ~ my gratitude practice ringing in my ears
Even with so many training sessions that exhaust me as an introvert, I’ve been able to refuel myself through these daily practices. This is a miraculous shift and as I’m writing about it, I’m realizing just how much these little shifts have changed my life.
The Moment of Realization
While all the educational sessions I run have value for the students, there is one that significantly impacted me this year. It helped me realize just how far I’ve come in my own mental health journey.
How to Be a Good Teammate is a 60-minute workshop that I host with each of our 18 athletic teams each fall. This one focuses on noticing warning signs of mental or behavioral health concerns and building skills for helping others when needed.
One component of the workshop this year includes sharing this short yet powerful message from Kara Lawson, head basketball coach at Duke, which has been viewed over 1.3 million times online, and for good reason:
“Things don’t get easier, you become someone who handles the hard stuff better.”
The simple reminder that every meaningful pursuit in life is difficult and requires practice has been a helpful reframe for me, and the students.
While watching and discussing this with the women’s lacrosse team, I realized that I’m someone who handles hard stuff better than I used to - and that got me wondering: “How? How have I been able to handle this year better than any other year in the past?”
Then one of the students remarked at the end on her way out: “I just love how you always start with having us stretch and take deep breaths. I needed that. Thank you.”
That’s when it hit me.
I’ve been including yoga techniques of breathwork and mindful movement in every single session I lead. While it might be less than 5 minutes each time, I’ve been consistently doing it myself while leading it for them.
"Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out" - Robert Collier
We start with a happy star pose while repeating out loud I’m a Star! You’re a Star! We’re all Stars! They all giggle and enjoy it, even the football players. Then a heart-opening stretch. A relaxing lower back release. A strong mountain pose with three conscious deep breaths. It’s a short but helpful beginning to our training.
While leading 28 training sessions over the past few weeks, I’ve managed to ensure I engaged in 28 brief yoga exercises - and it’s been life-changing!
Daily Practices Change Lives
During the August Crunch in years past, I’d become extremely stressed in part because I’d miss my routine of attending 4-6 yoga classes a week. I need that daily practice.
Now I’m realizing I don’t need to experience it in the studio and the entirety of yoga is what’s been helping, not just the physical poses or asanas. It’s the ability to be present, to let go of what we can’t control, and to take things one step at a time. Some of my daily practices include:
I think of at least 3 things I’m grateful for before I get out of bed in the morning.
While walking around campus between sessions, I’ve been using the loving-kindness meditation and sending love to each person I pass with a smile.
I’ve been making a real effort to sit and meditate for a few minutes before bed.
Earlier this week, when I had a few minutes between meetings, I found myself in my office with the door closed, breathing deeply, and stretching on my floor.
Yoga practices have become a part of who I am regardless of where I am.
It’s all of it together. The yoga practices, therapy, mental reframes, and a gratitude practice - they’ve all merged to create a hard-working woman who isn’t isolating during her busy season but is instead exclaiming, “I love my job!” I’ve said that for years but never during the August Crunch and it feels good.
With practice, I’ve also learned how to handle the hard task of managing this passion project of publishing on Substack! The last 3 weeks I’ve interviewed 3 amazing inspirational women for this publication to help save my brain power for my students.
In case you missed them:
Cheryl Cantafio’s book A Place No Flowers Grow is out in less than 10 days!
The Darlington Book Ball tickets are now available for purchase!
Learn more about yoga with
and her substack !
Journal Prompts:
Stand in a tall mountain pose with your feet beneath your hips, and toes straight. Pull your kneecaps up to engage your quad. Pull your belly button toward your spine. Broad shoulders, arms down long, palms forward. In this strong posture, take 3 of the deepest breaths you’ve taken all day. Write about that experience and about any breathwork, postures, or meditation practices you’ve tried and how they’ve impacted you.
What are your thoughts on the Kara Lawson video above? Write about examples of how you’ve been able to handle hard things better over time and with practice.
Daily practices change lives. What do you do daily? What is your routine in the morning or at night? In what ways would you like to enhance your daily practices?
Looking for more?
Join the October Learning Circle. We'll meet on two Tuesdays - October 8 and October 22 - from 7:45pm-9pm EST to discuss Don Miguel Ruiz's classic, The Four Agreements. We’ll use the book as a jumping-off point to dive deep into our own stories, values, and commitments. Space is limited. Save your spot now!
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Mindset is everything! We can do hard things with more ease when we shift our mind.
Gifts of Imperfection is an awesome book club book. I covered that book over 6 or 7 months doing a chapter at every meeting. There's so much there!
Thank you Katie. Your journey deeply resonates with me. For years, I too have faced the struggle of feeling overwhelmed and disengaged. But your realization about mindset is powerful—how a shift in perspective can truly transform how we handle familiar challenges. Thank you for sharing this inspiring insight.